"Biggest Dorks in History" for 600, Alex

Hi, hey, hello there. Remember me? I used to write diary entries occasionally. Apparently, I am now too lazy busy and fabulous to be bothered with such things. Or not.

The dog situation is fabulous. Young Mitchell, Mitchellodeon, Mitchellicious, whatever I may call him, is a great little doggie. He's very smart and obedient, and he's crazy sweet. I bask in his preciousness. Or I did, until last night.

See, I was trying to avoid the whole dog-in-bed-with-us situation, if possible. And that had worked out just fine, until last night. It rained. Actually, there was a thunderstorm, and Mitch, it seems, is afraid of thunder. Cue the scratching at the bedroom door, the whimpering, the sound of little chihuahua-toenails clattering across the hardwood floor. Up and down the hallway. UP AND DOWN. WHIMPER WHIMPER. All night long. Seth would periodically wake up and go sit on the couch with Mitch, I guess in some sort of doggie therapy approach?

Anyway, long story short: I feel like ass today, partly because I got about 2 hours of sleep, and mostly because I am allergic to everything in the whole world in the springtime. Oh, spring, you beautiful, sunshiney bitch.


So, here's something kind of neat: I tried out for Jeopardy! (the exclaimation point is supposed to be there; it's part of the title. Jeopardy! See?) Seth tried out, too, but we won't talk about that, except to say that I am officially the smartest person in our house now. Ahem.

Anyway, the auditions were fun. I went to the lame-o Sheraton and waited out in the lobby and read my Dictionary of Cultural Literacy, while more than one middle-aged white dude looked down his nose at me. But did those old fellas pass the test? NO. BUT I DID. I'll take "Eat That, Old Condescending Guy," for $1000, Alex!

Uh. So, I passed the written test (one of only 15 in my group of 100 to pass, thanks), and then I had to play a mock round (with real Jeopardy! buzzers, which was very sadly thrilling to me). I didn't do such a bang-up job with the mock round. I think they wanted more of a zing-y cheesy personality, and that ain't me. (Special request: please help me to think up interesting things about myself. It's okay, you can make them up.)

Now, all I can do is sit by the phone and wait for those crazy Jeopardy! folks to call me.

Oh, and I got to keep my official Jeopardy! test-taking pen. Jealous?

emiloo at 2:20 p.m.